Things will continue to change for you and the ultimate outcome will be a positive one in your favor. Let's continue to hope it will be an improvement of your relationship with your W.
Remember that you have nothing to worry about today because you have done nothing wrong. You are ready and the court will see that you are a wonderful father.
Follow Jeff's advice about cutting wood and you'll come out on top.
We'll be thinking of you and will be anxiously awaiting your results.
I just wanted to stop by and send you lots of positive enery and BIG HUGS. You are going to be so awesome today. I'd tell you to picute me in a really garish cheerleading outfit complete with pom poms, but that really could make you crazy. Just the thought gives me the willies.
Seriously, all you have to do is look with your minds eye to see all of there behind you.
ha ha ha! That gave me a good laugh, Grace! and I needed it.
Bummer today. I did not get to testify after all. There was no testimony. The judge seemed rushed, seemed like she did not carefully read the reams of filings we had made. She wasn't clear on the details. None of the inaccuracies came out. None of the lies.
It feels so important to me, yet the judge was very clearly in a hurry to get through it.
ah well.
The punch line - the DVPO was granted, for a year. Too bad for me. As for my motion for temporary orders - denied. The next step in the path is a parental evaluation, to be conducted starting in the next week or so. After that assessment, we'll come up with a parenting plan, and the court may modify or even rescind the DVPO at that time. Essentially the judge threw her hands up and said - I don't know what to do so I am going to ask for an expert evaluation on this.
I'm not feeling the best right now. It's not a significant change from what I have now. But, I was hoping to get an improvement. I thought a full "hearing" (in the literal sense, not in the legal sense) would allow the truth to come out, but we didn't have time for that. So ... status quo.
Afterwards, I phoned some of W's friends. Even now, none of them understand how she could be so angry at me, how our marriage went so bad so quickly.
One of the big things my wife said is that I have called her friends to intimidate them, so they would not file statements on her behalf in this case, and so on. I phoned these family friends back again today to inquire - not one of them said they felt intimidated by me. Not one. Someone here is not telling the truth... It's either my wife or all of our friends. I know which one I'm betting on.
One of those friends shared some memories with me of 2 years ago on my birthday. Their family was at our house, we had a big shindig, lots of people, lots of laughing and smiling. I told this friend that when I went to bed that night, I thought I was the luckiest man alive. I thanked the Lord for my blessings, most of all to be surrounded by my family and friends. I was very moved. I went to sleep smiling.
It was only a month later that my wife jumped into the sack with the former friend of mine (who was also at the dinner table with us that night). I can only shake my head.
My attorney got to see my wife for the first time - she remarked to me "She is really angry." Apparently that is very clear even to the casual observer.
M 43 S14 S13 D11 D7 Divorce final: Jan 2009 Making it up as I go....
SPM, I have been thinking about you throughout the day. I am so sorry things did not go the way you wanted them to.
You know your truth. Hold onto that. Hold onto your memories, they are real. Your wife is angry because she is confused and in crisis.
You have to regroup. I know it will be hard, but try to get your PMA back. Better days are coming. I have to believe that in the end, honesty matters, integrity matters, dignity matters.
Sir; I am sorry things didn't go better for you...I was hoping you would get your say...but you really don't have to say anything..it will all come out in the end...she is going to regret all of this some day...just watch...my H says I'm painting a pretty picture for my family and friends and I told him that I didn't have to say a thing, they could figure him out all by themselves...I told my family and friends how much I loved him....we all know that in the end they are the ones bringing all the pain on to themselves...
You are doing so awesome..I don't think I could do what you are doing and with such a positive attitude...you have a huge heart..your kids know you are a great dad...it will show..trust God!
((((hugs)))
Treese
Treese
H 49 M 45 D 23, D17, S12 M 25 T 31 01/07 OW H at my door w/proof Bomb ILYBINILWY 06/07 Sep 01/08 headed for the greener grass, Mar08.B#2H has child who is 9 11/08 pos.paternity
Hey, I'm sorry the judge was not the one you were hoping for. However, you will get to do the parental evaluation (just like me) and your wife will have to disclose EVERYTHING W/ PROOF, so you'll have your chance to have your say.
My L told me that most Ws go into the parenting evaluation discussing what is best for "them" and not the kids. Be sure to focus on your kids and practice your lines w/ your L well in advance.
I am disappointed for you b/c I know you were looking for more concrete answers, but they didn't ocme. They will come, but it just won't be today. I'm sorry about that, my friend, but you will be fine.
You are a wonderful father and a good man. Keep those two things in prespective and you'll continue to do well.
I guess now we have even more in common, eh?
I'm heading off to the airport now, but I e-mailed you my phone number if you want to contact me this weekend.
Take care. You did well today because you will prevail here. It will just take more patience.
You will get your say in court and the cream always comes to the top. These MLCers are nuts. I think they actually believe thier own stuff. Crazy. Hangin in there man your day is coming.
This is just the opening round of a long fight. Don't read anything into it. Now is the time to dig down deep and remember who you are. No matter what crud your W slings at you, don't let her get to you. Don't give her any power over you.
