Talking and sharing things with my H helped me. I did a lot of pride swallowing through the MLC. And it helped that my H let me vent my anger and frustration to him. He allowed me to heal that way, and be as angry as I wanted. He also allowed me to question him about everything.
I also taught myself to let things go. That life is too short to hold onto things that are in the past. Sure he cheated on me, and said pretty nasty things to me while he was in MLC. But, really it's the love that I have for him that is the most important.
My H never got unconditional love from his Mom. Which I could never understand. So he never knew what it was like to have that, and it scared the crap out of him. Even to this day it does. But, he knows that my love is unconditional and I would never stop loving him because of who he is. I may get angry or upset, but I wouldn't stop loving him.
That's the biggest thing that helped.
Oh and communication. LOL That too....
RU
To love and be loved is to feel the sun from both sides. - David Viscott
