Judge Not Lest Ye Be Judged! and Let He Who is Without Sin Cast the First Stone
The website wouldn't exist if it weren't for "judgment".
What do you think it is we've all been doing here?
This IS about our collective judgments. And hopefully the improvement of it in the days, weeks, months and years to come. We judge each other's situations, each other's states of mind and we offer our understanding, our experiences, our advice and swift kicks in the butt when needed. In addition to all of that, yes, we sometimes keep it light and we laugh with each other. It is my understanding that some of you don't like that. Those of you that know me can well imagine what my response is to that...
I'm sorry for those among us that think that advice should always be tempered and come wrapped in a big bow. You are delusional because this ain't no damn walk through the tulips. You will likely be one that leaves in a huff after a few weeks here - unless of course, you are particularly hardheaded and set your sights on changing us. Good luck with that. Life turned us inside out and what you see here is the good, the bad and the ugly that is associated with real LIVING. We're survivors but surviving ain't always pretty. Deal with it.
I think "regulars" have a right to voice their opinions and the powers that be have a responsibility to address legitimate gripes, of which there have been many, along with the crap we've all helped to produce in the last 2 weeks. By and large, we were ignored, smacked down and disregarded. If that was okay with you, cool, but here's a wakeup call for the idealistic suck ups among us: the moderators don't keep these boards going, the people do. And they are not respected. The definition of the word "respect" flies fast and loose around here, too. I've got no problem admitting that at times we do tend to beat the pure hell out of an already dead horse. Here's a straw for you, suck that up, too, while you're sucking up to the head honchos like it's going to get you a free book or something.
In-fighting sucks. I think we've all had enough of that. But do you know what sucks worse? The enormous lack of humility and countless people whose vision won't expand past their already painfully narrow viewpoints. I know my views on certain things have definitely been changed here and I've got no problem giving you one huge example:
Bworl and Deb.
When I first came to know that they - two "divorce-busters" - had hooked up here on the board - in the midst of all this - and were planning to get married - I flipped a lid I didn't think could have a self-righteous thought left in it after all I'd been through. I was wrong. Over time, a lot of time, my opinion changed. On one hand I've mellowed (yeah, imagine how I used to be) but on the other, I've just seen so much PAIN in the faces, voices and typed words of US ALL, that I began to think: if they found companionship in the middle of all that, and then love, who the hell are we (Jeanette) to judge them? Yes, that is the type of judgment we DON'T need on these boards. I'd love to say "If you can't say something nice, don't say anything at all" but hey, somedays I might have never typed a word...so I'll just say what I learned to do myself in most instances and that is "don't throw stones when you yourself live in a glass house". You think I'm harsh? You can not imagine the times that thinking that has caused me not to type a word - or to temper what I DID type. Regarding Bworl and Deb, I wouldn't dare try to stand on the only Word I trust and say God won't recognize their upcoming union because no one knows that but God. He knows what they've been through, how they tried to save their marriages and He ALONE knows if their divorces were "legal" in the biblical sense. He alone. And who ARE we to speak negatively to them, or any others like them, when it is they alone that get to talk about their relationship with Jesus one day? I suggest we all (and I've been doing this a lot lately) think about what He's going to want to talk with US about, 'cause there's not a one of us that's as pure as the driven snow on this board. Not one righteous among us.
To Sg: My opinion of your actions is well known. I do think in some cases you were just doing what you were told and you were allowed to be the scapegoat. For those instances, I apologize for "attacking" you (NOTE: I disagree with the word "attack" as it has been used because we were ignored for days on end). Now, my apology is not to say I like the way the boards look because I don't. They're a mess. But what I think is irrelevant in the grand scheme of things. That said, the methods employed by you and those you work with suck but good luck with them just the same. Maybe in the long run, things will be better. I DON'T think that will happen without MUCH more interacting with the posters from here on out, but time will tell.
Faith, there's not a scripture written that will encompass all that is going on this board and in it's undercurrents.
