So H stayed over last night. It was kind of awkward having him here, but overall it was alright.

When I left to drop off S12 at his martial arts class, I decided to give H a call just to say hi and see what he was up to. He said not much, he was just watching some TV. So I said, "Well if you'd like to come and hang out with us, you can. I'm dropping off S12, and I'll be home in about 5 minutes. I'm going to bbq some steaks for dinner tonight. You're more than welcome to join us." H said that sounded good and he would be over in a little while.

I got home, cleaned up toys and other stuff, prepped dinner, then started the grill. At that point, I realized it was getting close to having to go get S12 from class, so I called H again and asked if he wouldn't mind picking him up. He said no prob.

By the time they got here, dinner was ready, and we all enjoyed it together. S12's participating in a "Family Life" course this week, so that made for interesting dinner conversation ! Geez, I am so not ready to think about my boys, the birds and the bees..... They're growing too fast for me! H was really into it though. He told S12 and S8 to never feel like they can't come to either one of us and talk. I agreed (although I hope they go to H first! )

After dinner, they all thanked me for it. Then H and the boys goofed around with each other while I cleaned the kitchen.

Around 8:30pm, the boys took their showers and got ready for bed. H asked them, "Hey, guys, is it ok if I stay over tonight?" All 3 shouted yes! They gave us hugs and kisses goodnight, then I put them to bed, except for S3. He wasn't ready yet, so he stayed up with H and me while we watched some TV together.

We didn't talk much. Actually, I didn't talk much; I mostly listened. H was yammering away about sports, what was on TV, and some guy at work who's teaching him about stock trading (this guy's been doing it for years and has done extremely well).

Then after awhile, I noticed H was really quiet, so I looked over at him. He had passed out! Poor guy. He had come off graveyard shift yesterday morning, and he said he was only able to get an hour of sleep all day.

I woke him up to see if he wanted to lay in the bed, but he said not yet, and he didn't want to go to bed by himself anyway. Then he fell right back asleep. I think I was finally ready for bed around 11pm, so I woke him up again and said let's go to bed. S3 was still awake and demanded to sleep in-between us. I noticed that S3 was behaving like my little shadow all evening. Having H around at night is very strange and new to him. Hopefully it will get easier for him to understand what's going on.

A very uncomfortable night of sleep for all three of us (H, me, and S3). I have a king-size bed, but H is a big guy. Not fat, just big and tall. I could see that H still likes to spread out over half of the bed, and last night, S3 not only was stuck to me like glue, he kept pushing me towards the edge. I think I only had about 1/4 of the bed, if that!

I woke H up again at 5am this morning for work. After he cleaned up, he stood by my bedside and said thanks for letting him stay overnight. He also said, "He needs to be in his own bed."

I agree, so I think after work this evening, I'm going to stop by my parents' house and at least pick up S3's bed for now. I think H will appreciate that, and even more so if he comes over after work tonight like he said he probably would.

No expectations.

BTW - H called earlier this morning to wish me a happy b-day. He said if he didn't have to work a double shift today, and if I didn't have to work tonight either, he would've liked to been able to take me out this evening. I thanked him but told him not to worry about it. He said he knew, but he still wants to do something or get something nice for me. He mentioned something about Sunday being a possibility if we can get a sitter for the evening.

Getting over a painful experience is much like crossing monkey bars. You have to let go at some point in order to move forward. ~ Joseph Campbell