Although I am using a new user name, I have been here since December of 2006. Before anything else, I want to thank all of my fellow Dbers who encouraged, edified and sometimes corrected me. I thank you from the bottom of my heart.
I always thought the story of my wife and I would be a love story for the ages.... We met.... We fell in love... Right before we went our separate ways, I told her, "It will NEVER be over!" Both of us got married.. Both of our marriages unraveled in time... She never forgot my last words to her...
She called me one morning at 2:00 AM... She barely had time to say hello.... I had to tell her what I was on my heart..... I told her, "I am so sorry for hurting you. I love you. Will you be my wife?" I heard silence.... I said, "Are you still there?" She said, "I thought you were going to pretend you did not know who I was or hang up on me. I was not expecting that." We talked for nearly four hours.... We talked about how much we missed each other... We talked about what was going on in our families.... We talked about when we would be together...
She ended up moving to my town within a couple months....... We were married a couple months later....
I encouraged her to get her degree... She did.... She got a job in her field.... My career took off....
We settled in.... Bought a house.... Years went by.... Bought another house...... Years went by......
I really wanted to work on our M in August of 2006 when I had surgery...... I was just recovering from surgery when she dropped the bomb in October of 2006.....
She said she really loved me in the past but did not anymore.... She said she never should have promised me anything.... She said she wanted me to find another woman.... All of the "standard" WAS bull.....
I was totally floored by all of this.... I had no idea there were any problems.... She never asked to sit down and talk about any issues... She never asked to go to counseling....
We went to C twice... All she really added was she wanted out of M..... "Standard" WAS bull again....
She lived in my house from bomb to February 2007... I asked her several times to move in with her sister or somewhere else.... She refused....
I saw her a few weeks after she moved to square away the taxes.... We had a cordial conversation...... When we parted, I walked her to the door and opened the garage door.... She was just sitting in her car, looking at the house.... I ran back upstairs to get my cell phone... She was still sitting in her car.... She did not pull away until I got in my car...
I did not see her for months until I was visiting a friend and saw her drive by my new car... I do not think she realized it was me....
While visiting a friend in July, I told her I was thinking about sending my exW a letter apologizing for all the things I thought I had done wrong.... She read it and thought it was a letter which opened the door without any pressure... exW never responded....
September rolls around..... I end up meeting a gal on what would have been our 13th wedding anniversary.... We end up hitting it off.... We ended up spending hours just talking... It was so great... We ended up talking about getting married...
She and I married in November.... Our families stayed at the house over the weekend... They got along so well... When everyone left, there were hugs all around...
My new wife and I cleaned out the house... We dropped off about 20 boxes at exW's house... She sent me an angry e-mail... She said I should not drop off any cards or letters we exchanged over the years... She said I should burn them or something... How dramatic is that!?!
Life is so different now.... We have pretty much renovated the house.... We have two little dogs... We are going to church together... We are praying together... It is so awesome to have a woman who lets me know what is on her heart and mind...
No_More_Dodo
"Chains do not hold a marriage together. It is threads, hundreds of tiny threads which sew people together through the years. That is what makes a marriage last --more than passion or even sex!" - Simone Signoret
