if you want a divorce; it sounds like he's probably cheated on you, so file for divorce.
if on the other hand, you want to save your marriage; move back in.
Quote:
I started applying the DB techniques even before I knew about them. 2 months later (June 2007), he said he was wrong, and was in love with me after all...
...
Everytime our situation comes up, he reminds me that he does not love me, and wants out of the marriage.
It sounds to me like your biggest problem with your marriage, is that your H has no idea what the purpose of marriage is. It sounds like his idea of marriage is, "two people should stay married, only so long as they 'love each other'"
Which is exactly backwards.
if that were was it was all about.. there would be no point for marriage in the first place! Two people who feel like they "love each other", are going to stay together, marriage or no marriage.
Marriage is a commitment, not a feeling. Marriage is a commitment, to stay together, and work on keeping things positive between you, even at times where you dont 'feel like' doing so.
Marriage exists, as a recognition that feelings do NOT stay the same. They come and go. That's why marriage is a commitment, not merely a public declaration of "I love you"
If you can convince your H to change his view on marriage, then you could have a chance at a good marriage, I think.
(you might try one of the various weekend crisis marriage retreats for that: retrouville, marriagebuilders, etc)
My current status: june 2006. Wife ran out and filed D. Finalized Jan 11, 2010, after 12.5 years M. 3 wonderful sons caught in the middle
