Hello everyone or should I say goodbye. I have not been on the site for a few weeks and probably will not be in the future except to check in and see how everyone else is doing. My marriage is over - there is absolutely no hope - in fact it is an exremely hostile divorce. I am trying to move on and feel when I am checking in with divorcebusting it only makes me feel well maybe there is hope - maybe he will suddenly wake up and be a totally different person - the one I married - and he will come back and be so sorry for how he has treated me and we will go to counseling and repair this relationship. But the truth is there is nothing left, he has treated me and my daughter awful, he is living and in love with someone else and we are fighting because he has invited his lover on visitation with my daughter when he has gone even an entire month without seeing her himself and I think he should wait 2 more months or so until we are officially divorced. SO my daughter is caught in the middle - hiding this information from me and feeling uncomfortable. She revealed it to me few days ago and he does not care becuase when he sees her she enjoys herself so its just my hangup because I am bitter and can not move on. I do blame myself in that I feel our marriage could have been saved if I would have DB from the start. But I have been so angry about the betrayal of the affair and other things that I have flip flopped back and forth between anger and DB. I will always wonder what would have happened if I had been the understanding wife from the start and just went on with my life and DB instead of crying and begging and then blaming him and telling him how awfule he was and then I would remember to DB and all of a sudden I would be nice. Who wants to come back to that. I have made the girlfriend look like the answer to everything. And it seems he has lost all respect for me and treats me that way. SO guys I want to thank everyone who read my story or who responded. Take care
I just wanted to add I dont want this person back - he is not the man I married - so I am ok with that - I just have to let go and mourn my marriage for what is was - which is difficult but I am trying to cope with knowing I have to have some kind of relationship for the rest of our lives for the child with someone who has basically treated me like dirt and still does - What I do keep saying to myself is if I change it will change the way people respond to me so I am working on that
