There is a book by Janis Spring "After the Affair" which is helping my W and I . She had an A and we are still working through the issues, but this book has helped us understand and express our feelings about the A. It gives a good perspective from both sides as far as feelings and describing what you need to be able to move on.
For me the visualizations took some time to go away, but they did. They come back every once in a while, but with some of the suggestions I know how to tell my W what I need from her as far as reassurances when I do remember.
