Tomato, I responded to you on your thread.. but I forgot to say that the "trust" thing you mentioned would be difficult for a LBS to hear.. because I wonder if the WAS does return how the LBS trusts that they are going to stay?? I guess I'll worry about that when I cross that bridge.
Now journalling.
H was here tonight.. was his time with D2 but as you know he generally likes for me to be here too. Was a nice visit. He stuck around for a half hour or so after D2 went to bed to chat.. didn't speak about anything really.. just chit chat type stuff. So no news to report. I guess if I had to find a positive it would be that he's not racing out of the house once D2 is put into bed but he's not staying for hours either.
Just checking in on you! H and I have had sex maybe 5 times since I found out about the A in November. We didn't have it for about 6 weeks and then had it a few weeks ago. I was glad in the moment, but the next day looking back it felt definitely like "sex", no "lovemaking" involved. Since then we had one episode last week of touching/playing which felt a lot nicer since we kissed on the mouth, which is more intimate to me than sex anyway. But I'll never beat you up over sex. It is something I think about a lot and wish was happening more.
The frequent phone calls the other day sound positive too. And I have been warned that after a day like that they often pull back, almost to see if you will revert back to pursuing. And you didn't, so good for you!!
Thank you Bobbijo. It would be nice to think that it was just the natural reaction to pull back after putting so much attention forth. My Mom said she thought he was likely just bored.. I prefer your positive spin.. so thank you!
I don't know if I've mentioned it before but I'm kind of uptight about Easter coming up. Technically it's H's weekend with D2 and that means this will be the first holiday I spend without her.. nevermind without H.
I haven't brought it up with H.. I'm not sure if I should or shouldn't and if I should I'm not sure what to say. We've always spent Easter with his family.. I've spoken to my sister and she said that D2 and I are welcome to spend Easter with her.. but I think it'll likely be just me. And the thought kind of brings me really down.
I have been thinking about your post about Easter. I think maybe you could write down a few things that you want to say about this Holiday and your thoughts to H. It wouldn't be good if you didn't say anything because it'll nag at your stomach. You just need to be open, honest and non judgemental when you do speak with him. I'm sure you could both reach an agreement where everyone's a least somewhat happy.
Jen
Last edited by JenInVen; 03/04/0805:07 PM.
Jen *The more anger towards the past you carry in your heart, the less capable you are of loving in the present*
From a guys perspective I would have to say that lingering is really good for you. We're simple and somewhat dumb. When we get confused we don't know how to react well. Therefore, we kinda stand around waiting for clarity.
I'd just let him. No pressure. Give him the rope and let him get his head clear. Pressure would only bring the wrong things into focus right now.
I hear you on the Easter thing. Our Cdn Thanksgiving was the first for me and I bawled the whole weekend. It sounds like you guys still have good communication though so hopefully you can figure something out that will work well for you both. J~
M 35 H 29 M 4 yrs T 9 yrs D 3 S born 10/19/07 Bomb 09/10/07 Separated next day OW - broke up and H moved out 09/07/08 Status - still figuring this out
I've missed you around here Woog.. although I completely understand why you haven't been coming around much!
And thank you Jenny... I find I used to so look forward to the holidays and long weekends.. but when I don't have my little one to share them with now (possibly) I don't relish the as much these days. Oh, and I'm not sure if you noticed my email but I did email you (I can't access Hotmail from work so I'll log in to it when I get home).
