Wasn't too happy to hear the "we just grew apart" rationalisation from W about why we are divorcing, but she believes it and is pursuing a new life and people so we definitely are moving apart by virtue of her running away. Also had the "I think the kids will be happier getting the best of two happy people" speech and the "I know people who are divorced that spend lots of time together for the sake of the kids, even go on holidays together with their new partners included" speech. Hmm.
At least I'm sleeping a bit better again, W hasn't been staying up late or going out all night and then disturbing me when she comes back. Another reason the whole sleeper couch in the study doesn't seem a good idea, she will stay up all night and make a noise, definitely not fair for me. Looks like we will have to tell the kids about the coming divorce soon as well, hard to miss the obviousness of W moving into another room.
Your W has the same "script" as my H! The whole grew apart comment--well if my H didn't spend 30 hours on his affair we could just as easily grow together by spending time together of course! And of course I think the kids would be happier with their parents being happily married to each other-I know mine would be! Okay, my H hasn't mentioned the holidays together as he knows that would never work! Who does that???? I don't think that would work out for many people!!! I think they just say those things to make themselves feel better, less guilty, like they are doing these things to improve everyone's life or something, when of course they are not!
My H also moved out of our room about 2 months ago into another room. I guess it is part of that distancing they are going through. My kids, 8 and 14, actually took it pretty well and seem fine with it, I was the one that had a tougher time with it, after 22 years of sleeping in the same bed, it was tough for me to get used to and I had a bunch of sleepless nights. I guess you just have to get used to it eventually.
Sorry for you that you are tired and sad about your W. Hopefully she will come to her senses soon!!! Karen
Karen
