I am absolutely understanding the loving detachment. That's exactly where I am right now.
Wow, k, you sound lots better! I had lost your thread, but I found it today.
What I notice about you is that in your last thread, you seemed to feel that you had to do something, to fix something, to follow his lead and act upon something. All of it re-active to his actions.
True loving detachment is very "active", but not at all re-active. You choose to stop allowing his drama to run you, you stop trying to stop his drama. You notice it, but you get along with your stuff, with your kids. You keep interested in what he's doing, keep track of how he responds to things you do (if he does), and you don't pursue him at all. When / if he addresses you, you choose how you will act in response to him, and you hopefully never re-act to him.
