Help Me Act AS IF, Part 3

[cw68]

Thanks CW. At least your H says there's a chance at reconciling. Mine seems 100 percent certain that this is the only way.
He criticized me as a mother, said I never asked about his work (UNTRUE!!!), think only of myself, etc.

I am just reeling in agony. Despite our problems, we have always had fun and laughter and been great friends. Is there ANY relationship that doesn't get screwed up in some way, develop some bad dynamics over the course of 20 years??

Then the thought of not seeing my kids every day. I want to see them every day. But H wants 50/50 custody.

One of the things he finds so unpleasant about me are my histrionics, yet there I was, in full hysteria, sobbing and sobbing.

Luckily, I get to see the kids almost every day. Even if it's my H's day, I pick them up from school and stay until dinner time. Then I come back at 8am the next morning since my husband can't wait until 9:30am to go into work after our son's in school.

I can't imagine not seeing them everyday. My H and I still come around a lot even on our "off" days, but I'm trying to make it so that my husband doesn't see them some days. Not to be mean, but he once told me he didn't know if he could be the Dad who didn't see his kids everyday. If we do get divorced, things are going to be so fluid between us and I won't want to see him everyday. He's got to get a taste of that in order to make his decision wisely. (Of course, staying away isn't wise, right?)

And, 10-to-1 down the road you're H will say that he never said these things. My H did that today when we were talking.