When I first went looking for marriage-saving materials, I came across both DB and DR. I chose DR after reading MWD's intro: "It is precisely for this reason that I have written this book. I want to take the guesswork out of M-saving. And, unlike Divorce Busting, where I inadvertently gave some readers the faulty impression that they had to find a T like me to help them save their M's, I am going to show you how to become your own M expert...quickly! I have extracted the best and most effective ideas from my last book (DB), and broken them down into specific steps you can take - by yourself - to make your M work again. Plus, I have had the benefit of hearing from thousands of readers who have asked fantastic questions about the application of my ideas to their own unique situations. It has forced me to become clearer and more specific about my DB program. In fact, I have distilled it to seven steps. These steps will be the road map you need to save your M."
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I did take comfort and that is why I went, wrong or not.
You went in order to seek that comfort, right? I totally empathize and understand the immense need to know.
I personally do not like to tell anyone that they're 'wrong'; it's not my place to do so. However, I do believe this might be something you will want to work on. Controlling yourself. Controlling your emotions as well as your very own actions.
Thought-stopping. If you can get your thoughts under control, you're likely to control the actions that may follow.
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Oddly this has not been an issue all the bills have always come to me and the history of the computer is wide open, in fact even his facebook and email accounts have the same passwords I set up on them.
Sharing of the bills, e-mails, etc are just some examples. There are other ways for your H to show that he's trustworthy. In fact, he's been doing it. Placing the phone calls to let you know where he was going, where he would be, what time he'd be home. He's being accountable and he's trying to show you that you can trust him.
Yes, H slipped up by not calling to let you know he would be out even later, but he was exactly where he said he would be. Take note of the positive and throw out the negative. I know it's difficult, but let it go.
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No kidding, on top of everything else, on Dec 23 2000, the December before we got married my H called my house at 4 am to tell me has 33 year old brother had just died in a snowmobile accident, his wife was pregrnant with their first child, he had fallen off his snowmobile and was run over on another snowmobile by one of my H's and my best friends(the one that owns the house ow is renting). So all of a sudden I also realized that these things happen too, and it has always been a fear of mine when it starts to get to those hours of the night.
Oh that is so sad! I'm sorry for your losses. How are his brother's W and child doing these days? I hope well.
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Date night has been postponed until tomorrow my parents watch D on Monday so we are going to have her sleep over there so we can have a nice evening.
Sounds nice! Hope it's great.
Getting over a painful experience is much like crossing monkey bars. You have to let go at some point in order to move forward. ~ Joseph Campbell
