Thanks guys! Ali, sounds like your BF is engaging a little more of late--may be kind of a similar thing w/ my W., but I'm not sure (our sitch's do seem to parallel on quite a few things!).
Okay, so a couple of days ago, W. emails me, I email back...we end up exchanging 6 emails in one day! Mostly short messages, some with some kind of actual purpose, some just silliness. Hmmm. She said she was procrastinating on work and kept checking her email to see if I had written back to her. As far as I know, she never sits around waiting for a message from me.
Yesterday, we email once during the day, very brief. Then at the end of my work day, she phones me (this is unheard of!). The reason for phoning seemed...legitimate, but not really necessary to phone about. It was ostensibly about some work related thing that had to do with both of us. Anyway, we talked about that and then chatted for about 20 minutes on the phone about other stuff. Then she had to go for a meeting. Almost seemed like there were a couple of pauses during the call...I'm probably reading too much into this but it almost felt like she wanted me to ask if she wanted to go for dinner or something. Anyway, I didn't ask. But then I called her an hour later at the end of her meeting and asked (I did struggle with whether to do this or not, but my gut was to casually put out the invite). We had tea together. She said she was too tired to go for dinner...but then we spent over an hour and a half with a cup of tea!
It was good to see her, and well...she was looking pretty good to me. Sometimes when she was talking about work, I must admit my mind was wandering to lustier ideas about her and I(!), then I'd snap out of it. There's nothing worse than feeling desire and then knowing that--oh yeah, right, ILYBNILWY--how could I forget?--the feeling isn't reciprocated. Ugh.
In an email a couple of days ago, she referred to me as "darling" (a term she's never used in our relshp before). It was one of those part joking? possibly part serious things in her message. Anyway, when we said goodnight, I got a one-arm hug and she said "okay, darling, goodnight". The hug lasted about 7/10's of a second, and it had a very friend feeling about it all. But this is a weird term to use. She has commented several times this week about my humour and that I am funny / make her laugh...this was always the case in our relshp, but it's good to hear I suppose.
Well, no email from her today. She's going away this coming week. Here I am on Sat night just thinking the whole situation is so weird and kind of crazy. I'm in one of those spaces where I'm confused and just like---I don't get why we're apart...it's so weird that we're not really totally apart, but we aren't together either. I'm like--HELLO--WHAT ARE YOU THINKING OVER THERE??? WHAT IS GOING ON WITH YOU?? WHY DID YOU LEAVE--WANT TO RUN THIS BY ME AGAIN BECAUSE IT STILL MAKES NO SENSE TO ME??
Well, I'm going to take it that a phone call is a good sign. The darling thing...well, it could be a friend/sarcastic/joking around platonic term. Certainly didn't have a romantic feel to it with the one-arm-less-than-2 seconds-hug thing. Sigh. This is the weirdest trip I've ever been on, bar none!!
Okay, Db'ers, be proud--I'm sticking with my GAL plan to go on a mini-hike tomorrow by myself, even though part of me was pathetically wanting to hang around "in case she wants to get together".
