I was hoping for the best, but trying not to be naive about what to expect. In the first half of the session my H admitted to things that up until now he had refused to admit. Amongst them were that our therapist not only was unhelpful, but made our sitch worse (i.e. letting us argue at every session without ever attempting to solve the issues that caused conflict and supporting my reluctance to move back in); that he understood why I left and did not come back when he asked; that our childhoods were poor examples of healthy relationships; and that knowing all of these things and with the right therapist our marriage could be saved. I felt a small bit of hope with these admissions. In the end he held his ground that the D is what he wanted.
Quote:
It's wonderful that your H admitted these things. As Michele's book says, "only listen to half of what he says". Is it possible that he held his ground on the D out of pride? He still has a chance to change his mind later.
[quote]I still have hope that the intensive planted a seed of doubt about D being the solution that he may realize in the days, weeks or months to come. [quote] Good for you. Hope is a good thing. I would be surprised if the intensive didn't plant a seed of doubt. [quote]Michele and I talked about my plan of action which included to let him know that I wasn't holding out hope for reconciliation, that I would still need time to come to terms with the D and I wanted to continue to work on our friendship.
So you each had individual sessions with her?
Quote:
It is too early, I think, to say if the intensive will mean the difference between us getting back together or not. I still believe, however, that it was worth every penny.
I agree it's too early. It will take as long as it needs to. Hope is good. I am sure it was worth the money. If I sum all my telephone sessions, they would probably cost the same or more.
Quote:
Michele is great! With Michele's help, a new plan and lots of prayer I believe that my marriage can be saved.
I am so happy to hear your positive attitude and outlook. Hang in there.
