As you noted on my other post, this is a tough one. I'm struggling with what seem like conflicting messages. On the one hand, we hear "No R talk." Then, some of us hardly see or interact with our spouses. I haven't seen mine in two months, and in January we had a phone conversation about the dogs. We email about dog drop off pick up once a week or so, and that is IT. Emails are one line, two at most. Straight and to the point.
We saw each other once in a while (but this more by chance than planning; no "dates" or talks about our marriage at all; sometimes the encounters involved her showing her rage, spewing venom my way) during earlier times of the separation, but nothing since December.
How does one DB in such a case? What might be the "exceptions" you refer to? Sometimes I wonder if I have done enough by saying, ever so briefly, last summer and fall that I was open to talking about things at any time. She has never accepted that offer.
Any ideas about what to do now? Is waiting until she initiates a conversation all I can do?
She says she wants a D, and I agreed, but no action from either of us since that email (yes, she actually said she wanted a D through email! More than a decade of marriage got me an email request for a D!).
I struggle between waiting for her to initiate the conversation about working on things, or her initiating the D, and thinking that I should go to her, in person somehow, and bring up the R to try to get a sense if there's any hope here. Yet everyone says that would likely fail miserably. I feel paralyzed by this.
