I just heard back from a SBT therapist I found in my area. I'm glad I kept looking b/c this site wasn't able to give me a lead.
Anyway, I had a really good talk with the therapist and definitely feel that she's who I want to see in a little bit. My husband has said that he's not opposed to MC down the line, after he's gotten some sessions under his belt. Turns out that the T that I spoke with is very close with the T my husband is going to. The best thing about this is I found out that his T is very pro-marriage.
I have a bit of hope for some good movement down the line. I told the T that I will be calling her in the future for MC, whether it's me alone or with my H. She said that we could definitely do this and she would work with my H's therapist while seeing just me. Happy, hopeful day. (It helps that it's 70s and sunny and I've been gardening for a couple of hours. One of my favorite things.)
Me: 42/H: 37 T: 10 years/M: 8 D9, S8 Bomb: 7.23.07 Separated: 1.20.08 D Final 3.19.09 Affair started in '05, found out parts in 11/07. They married 11.26.09