Yeah, gauranteed you'll feel differently in a week, a month, a year. I won't predict exactly how you'll feel or how long it will take, but it will change.
We're built to withstand this, to get past it, to have it fade into a memory. We're built to love again and be loved again too.
Just a thought, and please don't let a thought like this keep you from detaching, but what if he were to someday wake up, realize what he's done, face the consequences? Go ahead and close the door, but maybe you don't have to lock it. I'm just saying that he may come out of this some day. When that happens, he may want to contact you. He may ask forgiveness, he may not. He may want a relationship with you, he may not. It will be your choice what to do then. Hopefully, the anger will be gone and the hurt almost forgotten, and you can choose what to do. Any choice will be a good choice. Without hope, without expectations, can you leave the door unlocked? KWIM?
Now, while your processing your feelings, pain, hurt, anger, you'll also have to really look at yourself. What are you going to do now? Who do you want to be? What do you want your life to be like? A burden's been lifted. You've got some freedom now. What do you want to do with it? You better enjoy it, you paid enough for it ;-)
Good luck, best wishes always. Stick around too, we would miss you.
M45, W45,S15, D10, Bomb 10/3/06, Moved back in 11/6/06, finally ILY 9/07 last thread
