My husband is having an affair

[alwayshoping]

Again, I am touched by all these remarks. And honestly it is what keeps me hopeful. When I realized that my unhappiness came from me, I did apologize and went into some depth, but I have been limited because my acknowledgement of this and attempt to work on our MR came literally at the same time as he opened his heart to the OW. It was actually strange because he had gone away for the weekend snowmobiling and it was that weekend that I was home thinking of how I would approach him with my feelings. When he came home I noticed a huge change in him, I suppose mostly because my words had little effect on him and that came as a surprise. Later that week I found out through mutual friends that same weekend I was home reconsidering he had the OW express an interest in him. It's so frustrating because I had been thinking about what I wanted to do for several weeks and didn't want to approach him until I knew exactly what i wanted. My H has always been very considerate of me and was even going to cancel his plans that weekend because my schedule was busy and he felt guilty. So I felt his emotional presence until he met OW and since then he has grown more and more distant from me. Actually telling me that he is finally thinking of himself first. This week I am discovering through this network and reading the importance of doing what is right for me and that does feel good. I still believe deep in my heart that I should be with my H and I also find it hard not to snoop. He has no idea of what I know about the OW. But each time I find out more it just hurts me so hopefully i can stop this. So you know the OW women is from what I have found out blonde and the life of the party. Needing to be the center of attention, quite flirtatious and im sure admiring my H quite a bit who is also attractive. He has friends that I have never met that he snowmobiles with that are also feeding his ego....WOW he is the man to them to have this OW interested in him. This is not easy to complete with. I am not an unattractive women and when I took my space and would be out occassion I would have man express interest in me, but it sound as if this OW is sexier than me...and we have not been intimate for almost a year and infrequently prior. I also had made little attempts to be sexy because I wasnted happy either......I can be sexy I know. I am worried that my H is actually going to be hurt by this OW, she doesn't sound very caring. alittle self centered...but I have been that way somewhat with out giving my H the respect and admiration he deserves. I just hope he sees the difference and can find his way back in the meantime, I will remain strong but just softer than I normally am. Positive, cheerful and playful with our children and hope he realizes what he will be missing out on.

Truly cant thank everyone enough for letting me vent here and offering me feedback. It has given me more than I could express in words.