Moving out (or her moving out) may be easier on you, but will it help the M in the long run? Just playing devils advocate here.

My temper tantrum (gotta call it as I see it) was behind the stress of telling the kids and my anger at what's happening and my inability to do anything about it. It also had to do with H's inability to say sh!t if he has a mouthful.

So do you have plans for today/tonight?