hope - you sound very giving and unselfish to me. For example, this week, I'm having a rough week. We are following 2 weeks of no S because H was sick then I hurt my neck. Instead of offering me comfort, he chooses to sleep on the couch because it's too frustrating for him to sleep in bed with me and not have S. It's all about him and his needs, and believe me, I've read every book and tried everything AND things were better before this recent lull because we had agreed to take turns initiating.
So...you go for the intimacy. It will help as long as you are sincere that you won't lay on any guilt or frustration.
My H thinks if he hugs me once that that satisfies my intimacy need. He doesn't realize it takes three times as long to undo a bad deed or word than it does to create that negative moment.
