No, GoingForward, he never struggled (visibly at least) about whether or not to unzip his pants, still doesn't.
Yeah, cat, even though things on the surface seem normal (whatever THAT is), every n ow and then my H will just let it all out, the same old crap, many ties the same incident over and over as though he was traumatized for life because of each crime I committed. Such as- about twenty years ago, he decided t9o cook a dish, it was from a cookbook he had from goodness knows where. It was a hot tuna dish, and I did not eat fish back then, and it tasted very awful to me, and when he asked if I liked it, I said no. So, he is very upset still over that, and said I broke him from cooking for evermore. Even his mother remembers how he apparently was so upset over this. Like it was yesterday. Now, mind you, he has said over the years mean things to me if one of my dishes doesn't meet with his taste, and I STILL cook every day.
The flower incident was a one-time thing, too, but it still has him punishing me.
Also, he said one morning, when he was trying to speak to me, I held up my hand for him to not speak just yet, as I wasn't really awake yet (not a morning person) and had to have coffee, so I could even think. He said he went off and cried about it, and I said well, how many times did I do that? and he said once.
Once, just one dang time and I can never be forgiven for it. I did tell him he needed to forgive and move ahead, it wasn't good to keep all that resentment, But I believe he feeds off his resentment and it has been a good, although destructive, friend to him, and he doesn't want to lose it, because then he would have to face his own faults and misdemeanors, and the fact that HE is not the greatest person on earth.
And, cat, I believe this MLC stuff is much longer lasting and has residual effects that are almost brain altering for the time being. I guess we have to (if we choose) bear with it, and see what happens when they finally emerge from the other side.
I know I want some awful big apologies and some remorse from him. Yeah, I know good luck with THAT!!!
