Great Question. ACT AS IF sounds like a vague concept.

ACT AS IF is real life, in the moment. In this situation, it's not pretend everything's roses and he's coming back any second now.

It can be something like he didn't call your son tonight like he was supposed to. He's living with another woman. She may even have kids. They Your kid's really really disappointed. You hurt for your kid if not for yourself. How do you act?

Unless you're in super control of your emotions, you probably often react according to how you think and feel about the situation.


ACT AS IF is about 'framing' if you look at it the 'Tony Robbins' way.

You'd probably act very differently if you assumed in the different manners as below....let's look at some options:

1) He's with HER.(aack!) She wants him to...run errands for her, , have dinner and or wild sex with her. How would you act?

2) He's with HER KIDS (argh!!!) He's going to HER kids soccer game, helping her kids with homework...watching HER sick kids. What would you do?

3) He's working. Probably ignoring her and her kids too. What would you say to your kid?

4) He's overwhelmed. She won't let him call your kid. She's watching his every move. What would you say to him?

5) He's a doofus. He forgot? What would you say to your kid?

6) He's overwhelmed by everything. He's sick. He wasn't trying to hurt anyone, just couldn't get it together?




How would you handle each of those situations? Most likely VERY DIFFERENTLY?


Your actions (that followed your assumptions) will guide the NEXT interactions with your H...and maybe even that kid's interactions with your H.

Which assumptions do you choose?


ACT AS IF with the high road. Or one of them. (sometimes it isn't crystal clear--probably 4 or 6, maybe 5. NOT likely to be 1-3.


Last edited by sgctxok; 02/28/08 11:12 PM.
sg
Love is PATIENT, love is KIND, LOVE never fails / DB since 2001