Once the anger I had for my H subsided I think the harder thing to deal with was my disappointment in him. I expected him to have more insight and be a stronger person. I had always perceived him differently. I saw him more as a guy who doesn't even notice other women. Kind of like a handsome nerd who would never even look.... this was the very last thing I expected from him and probably the reason I was attracted to him in the first place. And to have this image I admired destroyed, that was difficult.
There is no arriving, ever. It is all a continual becoming.
