Beginning again like a newbie

[ACJ]

but I think maybe the email is not the new beginnings

I already knew that but sometimes you have to do what you feel is right and it felt right to do that.

Maybe it "aint what you do (or say) it's the way that you say it"

But IMO doing and saying nothing achieves nothing.

I'm having a bit of a melt down today. A couple of people at work yesterday alluded to the fact that I 'need' someone to be there for me. They were certainly right when they said children don't fill that void (and I wouldn't want them to). They are wrong in that I 'need' someone but I do miss the closeness that having your H around brings. More than anything I miss having someone to share the hard times with, someone who can just pick up the slack when I've reached the end of my tether.

It's not helping that I am so tired and that the kids are being 'ordinary' teenagers and just retreating to the bedrooms or out with their friends at every possible moment. I just feel so alone.

Its a good job there is only me here in the office right now as I'm sobbing. The phone keeps ringing and I'm trying really hard to disguise the fact that I am crying.