Hey Michelle! You just reminded me, I also wanted to write a letter, apologising for similiar things to you..I wrote three they got better as they went on, but not yet sent one (I dont know his address, LOL! well, not funny actually). I think its a great idea for you...in your sitch, I cant see you have much to lose right now, he is already withdrawn and being fairly uncommunicative and yuo need to maybe do something drastic!?
I too wanted to go into specifics...but the third letter did so less, but concentrated more on the WHY... I, like you I reckpn, have been the strong one in the R, I wanted to go back to college, I didnt think about the effect it would have on him (I paod for it, but that meant I was poor! Which affected us as a couple and ability to be spontaneous and go on holidays and stuff). I also hatched alot of plans for us and didnt really consider how he felt about as I was too busy being go getting and confident and SURE it was the right thing for us... so my letter ended up being, basically.. I am sorry that I didnt listen to you. I'm sorry that becuase I was strong and confident and sure of myself, and sure I was doing the right thing for us, that meant that I wasnt listening when you tried to voice concerns and doubts, or I brushed them aside and tried to convince you it was the right course of action. I can see that this meant I effectively controlled the R and was rather domineering, without realising it at the time, and over time, you must have felt increasinly ignored..and like yuor needs werent getting met, or that I wasnt considering how decisions I made were effecting you. You leaving me has been a very humbling experience and I can see now that its not right to conduct a R this way and I have learnt alot about my own behaviour and where I behaved badly and would like to apologise..
I dont know if that helps you at all !?
I didnt send it. Maybe it was tooo blamey on me? Afterall, my BF concealed things, he was a bad communicator, so he often said he was ok with stuff, rather than speak up and say he wasnt.
