I agree that the OM does not belong around D. I express months ago that I didn't want H's EA1 to have any part of our Ds' lives and he has respected that. Hopefully your W will get some brain cells firing long enough to do the same.
So you screwed up and brought it up at the wrong time. Your W will probably withdraw for awhile. Given her history, I don't think it will be for too long. Although she wants time to herself, I don't think she has it in her to take care of herself.
