Grace I went throught the phone book and went to see about 5 free consultations from lawyers.
I wanted to see what I was up against and what the different personalities were.
Then I talked to people that had gone through seperations or divorces and got some more names.
Ultimately I choose the lawyer for what she said to me right up front. I was cring because his of course was not what I wanted but I knew I had to protect myself.
She took out a box of kleenex and put it front of me and said "Do you see a counceller?"
"yes"
"good because I guarentee you she charges less that I do an hour. So when we get together lets get right down to business"
I was in shock but really that is just what I needed...my monies worth!
I immediately told her that I liked her and her style.
And that was that.
And she is like that at every meeting we have direct and to the meat of the matter.
Good luck and don't settle with one until you are comfortable.
E
"Sometimes in the winds of change, we find our true direction"
There is nothing wrong with setting boundaries. Nothing.
You do not need a lawyer yet. See how the talk goes.
Plan accordingly to see if you can say what you need to say without emotion. My wife told me she always knew I was dead serious when I was calm, my wife said that she knew when I was strong in my convictions because I wasn't emotional.
Your daughter...get her a C. If you or your husband has any benefit package they usually have a plan that includes up to 6 free visits regarding mental health. That almost always includes family / dependants.
Be honest with your H about the concerns you have regarding your children. It is in your (you and his) best interest for their (children) best interests to be honest with each other. Tell him honestly that you are not doing this for any guilt or repsonse from guilt. But a desire not to emotionally hurt them.
Grace,
Your strength and patience will be tested now. You have done so good fro so long, remember this is the hard and rocky path. Do not falter, it wasn't going to get easier, it might get harder, look to your feet right now, not down the road.
Experience is a brutal teacher, but you learn. My God, do you learn. - C.S. Lewis
Life is usually all about how you handle Plan B. - Jack3Beans
Listen without defending; Speak without offending - FaithinAK
Thanks for your take on the L. i'll keep it in mind.
Jack,
Quote:
Plan accordingly to see if you can say what you need to say without emotion.
I've been working it most of the afternoon. I text him to let him know I'd like to talk to him tonight and to ask if he had any idea when he would get here. I still haven't had a response. I sent it twice b/c he usually answers fairly quickly. It's been several hours now.
I feel ok, not real edgy, so whatever happens this is what I have to do.
Ultimately this is all about our D's. That is foremost in my mind.
Quote:
Do not falter, it wasn't going to get easier, it might get harder, look to your feet right now, not down the road.
Thank you for this. It gave ma a peaceful kind of strength.
It has taken me awhile to get here. Let's see if I can live up to my name and namesake.
