Grace, your advice sounds simple and wise. Break time! a new direction. An oblique approach is called for!
Gman, thanks for the props! I'm pulling for you!
Today I had sort of a low day. It was sunny, but I did not exercise. Missed opportunity.
Last night I met a very attractive young mother. She was a knockout, and very personable. But married! But she has a friend, she says....
Tomorrow I see my kiddos. It is the day before my youngest daughter's birthday. I got her a cool fairy outfit - wings and a gauzy ballet skirt and a leotard and a crown. She'll love it! I have a couple hours with them, so I hope to go out for ice cream and presents. I'm not asking to "participate with W" on any bday stuff from now on. (It's sort of silly with me being retrained by a protection order.) The most recent bday was my son's - Dec 10th. He wanted us all to be together and so I honored his request. I sat at a table with my cheatin' wife. I knew she feels guilty about splitting the family, so I tried to assuage that. At that time I had more hope. It was only 2 weeks since the filing. But no more. I'm done with that approach.
My bday is coming up, too. I wonder what is in store for me? I have no expectations, or even hopes re: W's recognition of the day. I wonder if she will be gracious enough to remind my kids of the day? Either way I will not take it personally. W's brother's bday is coming up. I am thinking of surprising him with something good.
At the same time I am working on divorce filings. Lots of paperwork filing motions for temporary custody orders and financial orders. This is the rotten business of divorce. It always brings me down a bit to go through the wreckage of our life together like this. But I am looking forward to having a house again - a warm place to call my own, to make my own, to welcome my kids into. Heh, and a master bedroom to bring hotties to. . . ok, with that last part maybe I am getting a little ahead of myself.
