peace: Really? Do you think a lot of them leave the A's? Is it just a matter of time? Does what is said about men not leaving Rs unless they have someone in the wings only apply to marriages? I know - all counter productive questions. And I actually CAN see my H staying with the ogre out of pity. Remember, these MLCers are cowards.
UD: Seriously - wouldn't it be great to know ANYTHING for certain about the triggers, the time frame, the outcome of our H's MLC? The unknown is what's so frustrating. We THINK we know what's going on, but the majority of the people out there, our H's included, think we're just crazy.
OC: I think H's family's ways are so deeply ingrained in him that he will never see that they are wrong. It's how he's grown up, how his mom raised him - it's all he knows. I agree about the awakening and him coming back for good, but I don't think the chances of it actually happening are good.
I feel like I'm giving this more time out of moral obligation only and not really any desire to actually be with my H anymore. My attitude and general unfriendliness towards him aren't pro-DB. I had to contact him today about problems with credit card and my upcoming trip. I did it through a text message and he texted me several times and called me about it. He was nice and is taking care of everything for me (or is somehow putting it through his company, which I don't care to know about). He called again later but I didn't answer, both times. By the time I finally called him back, he didn't answer my call (although I specifically called when I thought he wouldn't pick up since he'd most likely be with ogre). For me, I didn't do it as any sort of game - I just really didn't want to talk to him.
I question whether I've done a decent job of paving the way back home for him. I've definitely given him time and space and stopped asking any questions whatsoever. Like most of us here, I was the only one trying to hold the (non-existent) R together by being friendly and trying to do things as a family. When he rejected all my attempts, I gave up and now there's *really* no more R. Guilt, sadness and acceptance are setting in, but in a much different way than before. Now I feel these things because I feel like it's truly the end of the M. Before, my emotions were directly related to H, but now they're about the M. Have I achieved detachment??? Am I making any sense??? Insomnia is taking its toll on my brain cells.
