We have to have a R talk, before this thing can move past a certain point. I do not know if we are at that point, I can be patient longer. As necessary for him to set the pace.
Let him start any R talks. Reconnection and reconciliation are two completely different things IMO. You are still in reconnection. He needs to initiate reconciliation as that takes commitment and work. He will likely start an R talk at that point, but that could be a while (although with Brad Pitt lurking who knows ).
Originally Posted By: Holly06
But..... what if he thinks he can skate by this without satisfying my need for answers and closure? I have no evidence that he has been at the bottom at all. He could have been, out of my view, but I have to consider that he may have not bottomed out.
Again, part of reconciliation. Past the initial R talk. Once you two hit that point you can bring your issues to the table if he fails to address them to your satisfaction. A difficult balancing act to some degree, but at that point you need to get what you need in order to proceed or else what is the point?
Originally Posted By: Holly06
Our anniversary is March 1st. In what way should I acknowledge it?
I would be careful with this one. Anniversaries are the "anti-holiday" for many MLCers. Valentine's Day is much lighter, far less commitment. Anniversaries are for married people
That may or may not be a big deal for him, but it could be too much pressure. Besides, guys stress over what to get their wives more than anything. It is mainly a holiday for wives IMO.
Anyway, just my $.02. You are doing great so you should probably just trust your instincts as they haven't failed you yet (and as LBS we spend far too much time sweating the details).
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