Up and down we go, where it stops, nobody knows

[SirPrizeMe]

Meant to update on yesterday. I got to spend half the day with my kids. Picked 'em up at 10am, dropped em off at 530pm. Not enough time to go skiing, but we had a nice day anyway.

I made lunch for em, which is nice. We made collages. We played "snail" which is a hopscotch kind of thing that everybody can play. I wanted to play a little more with the boys, toss the football or frisbee, but you know, with four kids it is hard to find one thing that keeps everyone entertained. The girls didn't want to throw the football. Snail was fun - the littlest one, won the game. She was pleased.

We drew with chalk on the driveway. We made cupcakes. We did more collages. We had fun.

For a long while the girls played "spa" with me as the customer. They were massaging me, giving me haircuts and facials, I asked for a hair color, too. It was all pretend. They gave me foot massages and served me imaginary tea and pizza. They rubbed lotion into my face and arms. I loved every minute of it! They were cracking up, having a good time.

It wasn't all fun and games. Briefly, we talked about honesty. One of my sons commented that he knew how to "scam ebay". I told him that it is easy to figure out scams. Scams are everywhere. We talked about shoplifting and cheating. It's pretty easy to "get away with" stuff. But what we need to do is act honestly, even when no one is watching. Not too heavy, I think. Just a teaching moment.

Also with the same son I had to tell him to wash better. He stinks of BO! I told him politely, gently, and discretely of course. Apparently he is out of deodorant. Ah, fatherhood!

Smooches and hugs at the end of the visit. Leaving them is always hard for me. I cannot even call them in between our visits. These days, I always give them each a letter when we part. I am allowed to do that I guess. I hope. I just say that I love them and enjoy being with them and miss our time together.

Today I got a letter from our former Pastor, the guy who married us. It was a letter on my behalf - stating that he saw a normal relationship between me and the kids, me and the wife. I asked him to write a letter to the court, since I am now in a custody battle and W is alleging 22 years of abuse.

I can only shake my head. How did I get here? I am thankful he wrote it, of course.

This morning I went for a little bike ride - the sprained ankle worked fine. Got a good sweat going. That's good for me. My bike has been rehabbed and tuned up for Spring. It's working great. Everything is perfectly adjusted. I splurged on some new tires last night - the existing ones are getting worn and now lack traction. The bike will be like new when I get those tires on it. I'm psyched to ride some off-road stuff.

Riding inspires me. It's a real pleasure, a passion of mine. So I feel great about spending money getting my bike just the way I want it. It's my one vice! My one serious indulgence.

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I was recounting to a buddy a story I saw in the news about an apparently successful young doctor who led a double life - he was a bike enthusiast, and was in the habit of stealing high-end bicycles. Bikes worth $5000 or more. (yes, bikes can cost that much). Anyway as I was recounting it, I remembered that OM used to do the same thing. It just came back to me. (OM was my "friend".) I remember him going to bike shops and asking to take a bike for a "test ride" and then never returning with the bike. He thought it was the greatest scam. What a shyster.

I remembered this well AFTER I talked to my son about Honesty.

OM never developed the honesty habit. When we were in college, he used to go to the grocery store and stuff his clothes full of steaks, and then buy a pack of gum. He'd walk out with 100's of $ worth of meat in his clothing. All of us in college were poor, but he was the only one who behaved that way, as far as I knew.

Even in the summer of 2006, when he was 42 years old!, I remember him still acting this way, like a kid with bad morals. He'd run a scam if he thought he could get away with it. His bike broke, and he filed a false claim to get it fixed for free. This is a man who lived in a $600k house at the time. Why would he cheat like this? He didn't need the money. By any measure he was rich, very well off financially. Why would he cheat to get his bicycle fixed? Because he is a dishonest person to the core. Period.

His father left his mother when he was 2, and he never had a man in his life to act as a model - never had someone to look up to and aspire to emulate.

Neither did my wife (her father also left her mother, and then refused to pay child support). Coincidence that W and OM decided they were "soulmates"?

I've written too much!