This weekend I felt a bit down. If I wasn't doing something with D I was sleeping. It seems my bed has become my best friend. This morning I woke up early enough for work, but I wasn't motivated enough to leave the bed.
My W stays home during the day and I talked to her three times. The first time to tell her I was there for her. The second time to rephrase what I said and tell her I'm there if she needs anything. The last time to tell her nothing; until she got me talking.
She started off telling me I must have something on my mind. Of course I did but I wasn't going to reveal it to her. She told me to just say it so I did. I told her I'm an emotional person and I'm sorry she's not. For some reason your so guarded I said to her. You don't have to keep these defenses up with me. I'm willing to listen if you need me to. I told her that not having emotions is like being a robot or you're going to blow your top.
Then I ask her if the hugs I'm giving are bothering her. She told me if she didn't want them then she would have pushed me away. Then I told her that when I put my arms around you it bothered you. You didn't say anything, but it bothered you. She said some of the time it bothers her.
I'm so confused. My W use to break my fingers (she seemed to have forgotten about this)or elbow me in the ribs when she didn't want me putting my arm around her. Now I can put my arms around her but not all the time. When I do she doesn't say anything but it still bothers her.
