Pay no attention to the man behind the curtain 29

[MissH]

how can you go dark when there are kids involved its too hard.

Tell me about it. Sometimes though I think for my own sanity I go dim on him.

are you his friend i mean can he see the changes in you?

Well only he can answer the second part of that question, but yes, I am nice to him, I validate (but even with that he seems to be getting annoyed with me validating). I thank him when I can. For the most part, I don't react to him when he is a jerk, but hey, I am human so sometimes I slip.

I think part of the problem that hurts me is that when we do seem to get along, he is being really nice, I get my hopes up and then he does something that is really hurtful which makes me realize that the babysteps that I thought were there, weren't.

Snodderly and BND said that my H is a really hard one to crack. He has this distorted view of me and no matter how hard I try, that view doesn't change.

One thing I find funny is that my L and I sent his L and him proposal agreement papers weeks ago and we still haven't heard a word from them. He tells me the other day when he wasn't getting his way about something to have my L get a move on already. I didn't respond to that TM. My L is not the one holding it up.

Where was I going with this? Oh yeah...I guess I felt like he was stalling the divorce but then he does something which makes me realize he is still on the fast track to divorce.