Kerry, That is what is so discouraging. I want so much for this to work but I can't do both of our jobs. Only my end of the deal. So to wait and love and hope is just sooo hard. I want it to be over. Not our Marriage. Just the waiting. I want him to want it as bad as I want it. But he doesn't. He told me tonight it is impossible to be supportive of someone else when you don't have your own life together. I know it is true. I know he has to figure himself out before he can give me any encouragement or support. i told him I am willing to support him during his tough time b/c that is what a wife does for the H that she loves. But for whatever reason that is not enough. He just wants to take time to evaluate his life. he admits he is miserable. He says he hates the way things are. He doesn't know how to fix them. But he is doing nothing to try............ If it weren't for the kids I would be long gone by now so he could really see life without me. But the day I tell S5 1/2 will be the worst day of my life..... And I think it is coming up fast
I don't know how to live with "no expectations" anymore. That is what you have on a blind date. Not with the man you have loved for 16 years......
Just really really low tonight...... Actually it is 3 a.m. so I am really low this morning...
