So, you going to let her push your buttons? Or are you going to change your reactions?
If you know that something is a button, you can always rewire it, willing to bet you will fluster the hell outta her if you don't react the way she expects.
The problem with that, is if she is doing it to get you angry...she will get downright malicious to provoke a reaction she craves from you.
Man, you should print that and post it by the phone.
She wants you to get upset, she NEEDS you to get upset with her and get angry.
If you are angry and fight what she wants, she can justify her actions by saying to herself, "see, he is so unreasonable that I MUST divorce him."
Play into this if you want to. I did. For three F-ing years. Gosh-Darn-It! I am ashamed that I was so easily manipulated, and too dumb to see it!
Now, when she is spoiling for a fight, my reponses are "I'm not going to fight with you," and "I'm sorry you feel that way."
Thos responses will absolutley send her to the moon when she is spoiling for a fight. Ignore the anger that this generates, When she finally looks back, do you want to be the calm ex, or the angry volatile ex?
Much more importantly, these responses will put you back in control of YOUR communications with her. Not in control of her, but in control of what you say and do. It's a good place.
You will have to discuss things with her about time with the kids, just my thoughts, if you can set up a rigid (acceptable, or favorable to you,) schedule now, you can avoid the fights and other crap by insisting that everyone sticks to the agreement.
This avoids the "he's being a jerk by not agreeing to what I want" bit.
Make sure your atty knows that they are living in the OM's house. Talk to him/her about this, it might make a difference in custody issues in your state, although usually not.
These are my friends now!
But someday baby... You ain't worry my life anymore
Take away, take away what I don't need, save the good part please. Fade away, fade away.
