I keep hearing women justify their lack of interest in sex with their husbands because of many things...hormones, depression, poor body image, fatigue, unresolved conflicts,etc., but I would suspect that these same women could be aroused by a very hot dude on a business trip on some exotic island!!! My point is, I think it's mostly boredom and lack of attraction for their husbands! Tell the truth ladies!!!
Not me!!! I think it's lack of the emotional attachment more than anything. I'm completely UNinterested in anyone other than my H (I'm the HD spouse), but when I have moments of lack of arousal, it's usually b/c we don't have that emotional attachment that women crave. I saw a C b/c I thought that my H was "ugly" and unattractive. She said that it was lack of attachment. So we worked on it together, and pretty soon I was completely attracted again, and he never lost a pound.
Kellie ------ Me - 27 H - 31 S - born 8/18/2007 Married - 4/24/2005 Together - 7/03/2002
When we were younger I think it was the emotional attachment that was missing that messed me up sexually. I felt physically attracted to my H and at that time I wasn't bored, but after so many years of marriage (42) I think a lot of what you say is true. At least that is what set me off into a MLC late in life. My H wasn't giving me any attention and I was certainly bored to death. The longer you are M the harder you have to work at not being bored. It gets to be kind of tiring trying to think of things to do to keep from being bored if the other spouse doesn't like to do anything but watch TV. It sure helps when both parties are working together to keep bordom out of the MR. And of course, no matter how long you are M, you still need that emotional connection along with the physical.
It is not about what you feel should work in your M. It is about doing the work that gets the right results. Do what works!
I would say to that I crave the emotional connection with my wife. But for me, emotional connection is almost completely physical in nature. I would LOVE to talk about anything and everything, AFTER having sex, while holding my naked wife in my arms. My wife on the other hand, gets up after sex to go to the bathroom, and then when she gets back, is in her eskimo gear and gets into bed and goes right to sleep. She has never been an afterglow person.
She seems to NOT to enjoy the smell, the sweat, and all the other stuff of sex, and wants to get her body cleaned up right away, claims it can cause yeast infections (which she gets a lot).
