Treese, it's just so ridiculous, because, if I were "guilty" of abuse or "innocent" of abuse, I would provide the same answers. I would deny it. I would ask for her help in resolving it. Everyone else would think I am charming. So it's really dumb to use those questions as a litmus test, but for those in the lobotomy/abused spouse support group, I guess logic doesn't really interfere with their thinking.
Anyway I am glad you had a laugh. I'll bet you have a really nice laugh.
RTL, you wrote:
Quote:
I feel you pain w/ the L thing and the kids. My W didn't answer the phone when I called for D last night and she won't agree to 50/50 time split. I have the same issues that you do b/c I too will have to appear in front of some 3rd party and discuss why I'm worried about my W's ability to raise my D alone.
'Scuse me for saying so, but you appear to have it backwards, no? If you are the father, why do you have to justify to anyone as to why you should get time with your child?
Your "case", as it were, seems to be basically a negative campaign. In other words the stuff you talk about seems to be reasons why NOT to give custody to your wifey. I have a different perspective. I am looking for evidence that says you were an involved father (I hate that phrase!), you have a loving relationship with your daughter, that your daughter beenfits from the relationship with you. I think these are presumptions of family law courts these days in most states, but it wouldn't hurt to bolster your case by re-inforcing it.
You might also start planning what it looks like to be a single dad. What are your work hours? Where's the daycare? Who is your support network? What's your budget? And so on. The more prepared you are, the better chance you stand to get good consideration when it comes to custody. Demonstrate that you are preparing to be a good parent, and the court will take you seriously.
If you actually want to take custody away from your wife, in other words, you get primary custody and she gets less than 50% in time and decision making, then that is when I would go to the cutting, drinking, etc. But that is up to you. Also I am no lawyer. There are probably others who have better advice on this particular issue.
ps: I'm listening to John Mayer's song "She's gone." The story of my life these days.
