I got a chuckle out of the old cougar too. You think if her coworkers are saying that about her that she would have the sense to step back and look at the "R" w/ the OM. I have been on those long silent rides too. Glad she got chatty on the ride back.
She's processing a lot right now - I'll fill in at the bottom
Originally Posted By: lizzy
Maybe she picked Red Lobster so you wouldn't get the wrong idea. I know my H loves to say he doesn't want to give me false hope yet he constantly does stuff that merits a WTF.
As for the comment about it doesn't matter anymore...she probably won't remember saying it. And again, WTF does that mean. WAS certainly are great at making ambiguous statements.
We had to go to the mall to get a gift for her co-workers wife who's birthday is also today - Red Lobster just happened to be across the street, and she said she thought she would like it. Actually worked out more expensive than if we went to the other place.
When I brought up the nice restaurant, she commented that she wasn't dressed for it tonight, but that we could go another day and maybe go with some friends. Weird.
Originally Posted By: lizzy
Hope she likes her gifts. I decided not to get one for H as his in two weeks as he didn't even take Ds to get me one for m bday. Ds will get one for him which obviously will be my idea. I already know "they" are going to get him something for a hobby of his that I haven't been very supportive of all the time. H will have to spend time w/ me on bday as D10 has a competition that day. Enough of me.
It almost sounds like you're going for an 'eye for an eye', rather than doing what you really feel comfortable with... Don't not get him a gift because he didn't get you one. Maybe he'll feel bad about not getting you something and a spark will go off in his head.
Originally Posted By: lizzy
Glad you ended up having a good evening. Can't remember the last time we did something together as a couple. The fact that she was willing to go to dinner with you seems like a plus to me.
Last night was fun - Today was even better (I think). I got up early and went out to run some errands. W called me while I was out and said she'd been up most of the night because of a problem at work - We talked about it for a while, then we agreed we'd go run some other errands together and pick D up at lunch time. Ended up picking D up at 3pm
I took gifts over to W's house, but said we'd open them when D was around. W was still getting ready, so I went upstairs with her and we talked while she did her hair and all that stuff. There was a LOT of things in that conversation which opened my eyes.
1) She went off her anti-depressants. Not sure when exactly this happened, but it was in the last 4-6 weeks. She said that it made her feel foggy, but that she was going to see a psychiatrist who is in the same practice as her therapist. Hopefully she will actually do that.
2) She told me that she experiences a lot of anxiety, and after she went off her anti-depressants, a lot of her old problems came back (tension headaches, having problems dealing with stuff). She realizes that she needs to be on something, but she isn't sure what works best. I suggested that she talks to someone and maybe tries something I've had in the past - She really brightened up when I said that, and told me that the stuff I had really helped her.
3) She said a lot of her problems are related to how she deals with people and that she is very unhappy with her life right now. I didn't really get into much discussion about that, but we both agreed that medication isn't going to fix it all.
W told me she needed a new outfit for her dinner tonight, so off we went - Wandered around a mall for a hour or so, got coffee together then got something small for lunch. W told me over and over how tired she was, but that she was happy she worked on the problems in the night because she got praise from the VP she works under - I told her I was very proud of her.
After lunch we drove 30mins or so to the other side of town - I had to return a few things to a store, so while I did that W went to wander around. I found her a little later with a pile of books she wanted. Then someone called out my name, which is obviously weird, and it was a guy who used to work for a past client of mine. We talked for a while, and W introduced herself as my W. We're all in the same industry, so W joined in the conversation and we shared contact info. Well, that kicked W off into a spin about how we should get together and do work on the side, since we know so many people and we can find lots of projects. Not the first time she has brought this up, but she's talked about it a lot in the last week or two. I figured I might make some calls this weekend and see what I can drum up.
We finally went to pick up D from the ILs, a little later than the 'noon' guess I gave them this morning. D was fast asleep, so we waited a while for her to wake up and we left because W had to go out to her dinner at 5:15. We talked a lot on the way home about all sorts of things. W was REALLY stressed about getting home on time, but she didn't get mad at me about it - Just said that it was making her irritable and jittery.
Got back to W's house, and I took D in to change her and get her some snacks. W opened her gifts and got really excited. She also opened her cards and thought they were funny. She thanked me over and over for them, and told me that she felt she didn't deserve them. She initiated hugs and kisses, which was nice. I quickly gathered D up, since W had to get ready to go, and she hugged me again, we did ILY/ILYT and we were getting ready to leave - W stopped me and said she'd probably not stay out late tonight because she wasn't feeling good and she didn't really care much for the people she was going with. I told her she wanted to be home to play with the stuff I got her, and she said probably, but that she just felt under the weather. I told her I'd be around with D in the morning, then we could go to her parents for her b/day in the afternoon together.
So, I guess things are pretty 'okay' right now - She's obviously okay spending time with me, and she's talking a lot about how she feels and trying to better understand her problems. She talks over and over about a girl at work that OM has a thing for, so I guess there is some envy or conflict there, but I guess it's better she talks about it than it eats her from the inside out.
