H4C, I have been on both sides of this. Just rescently I was the one doing it. If it helps your W is not really sure what she wants, that is why she is doing what she is doing. The only thing that I can tell you is to continue to detach yourself from her and take baby steps don't put yourself out there to take huge leaps. That will benefit both you and your D. Remember DB 101, it took time for this to happen and it will take time to get it back.
