Help Me Act AS IF, Part 3

[cw68]

I think I would stop telling the D11 that nothing's wrong and that you're not getting divorced. This could really build up into her not trusting either of you guys. We told our kids that adult relationships can be complicated. Start with that. So when she asks you if something is wrong, don't lie and tell her nothing. Tell her that adult relationships can be complicated, that you love each other and that you both very much love them. Tell her that you haven't decided to divorce, that you still are together. It's reassuring, but not lying.

As for the kicking him out, I understand where you were, but I refused to stoop and/or make it easy for him. Tell him instead that he can't share your bed. Baby steps.