Feeling better today. Sometimes I think I get so caught up in moving forward with my life that I don't give myself time to work through certain emotions, and then bam! All of a sudden it all hits me, and I emotionally crash.

I suppose the real issue is H's ambivalence, which puts me in a state, too. It's a big problem for me, and I'm not sure how to handle it. Furthermore, I'm not sure that I really want to.

It hurts to see and hear his evident confusion and pain, and I feel like telling him I don't want him back when he's clearly showing these signs. I can't make him happy, only he can do that for himself, and at the same time, I feel as though I shouldn't turn my back on him either.

I really wish H would get help. I feel like it could make all the difference in the world, M'ed or not.

Getting over a painful experience is much like crossing monkey bars. You have to let go at some point in order to move forward. ~ Joseph Campbell