Being a man has nothing to do with control, direction, or manipulation. Maybe Dom will drop in on this thread and offer more on this,
heh.. ok, since you asked
I think being "the man in a woman's life" means.. .whatever that woman wants it to mean.
as you said, [many women] what a man who creates a sense of safety and support. But not all women do. and some women change their minds as to what they want in a man. Sometimes, multiple times in their lives!
best you can do, is just try to pay attention to what she wants now, i reckon.
My current status: june 2006. Wife ran out and filed D. Finalized Jan 11, 2010, after 12.5 years M. 3 wonderful sons caught in the middle