More brainstorming before I make ANY pitch at all:

- What would be good/bad timing (examples, please)?

- What real feelings can I get off my chest which would not take me further from my goal? (for example I really miss the kids, I still have feelings for W, I feel abandoned, I feel lonely, etc.)

- Would it be worth having an "agent" (like one of her best friends) discretely convey a message to her? If so how do I make this happen without backfiring?

- Clearly she wants to feel "in control", "call the shots", etc. Given this what should be my approach? (Remember I've given her time, I've given her space, I've given her $$$, I've given her rope to hang herself, there's at most a 10% chance of success and I'm human and there's a limit to my patience ...)