Helloooo...Smoother Ride....Where Are You?? - Pt.2

[SueS]

Instead of letting your wearing your ring be about him, please think of it as being about you. Let it represent your own commitment (or lack thereof) - not his. Control your own actions, and let go of his..

Rob- You are right. I always told myself that I wouldn't take my ring off until I was no longer married. I was just very angry this morning. H will never know that I took it off. I put it in my jewelry box and he never looks in there. I can put it back on before he gets home.

OK, this one threw me a little. It reads like you had convinced yourself he was actually through with this crap. I don't mean to be hurtful, but... please don't mistake a baby step on his part for something bigger. Baby steps are good, and to be appreciated - but that's all. I'm afraid your H has a long, loooong ways to go before he's through with this crap. I think you'll do better in your sitch to expect the worst, and be pleasantly surprised when things go better, than vice versa.

Again, you are right. I wasn't surprised that he'd done it again or felt that he was finished doing things like this. I guess I worded it or put it incorrectly. I guess for some reason it was just the 3:30 am that stuck with me. Maybe because I think the bars here close at 2:00 am. You are right that I'm better to expect the worst and be happy when things go better. The late nights make me think of the time not spent with D3, not just during the night he was out, but the next morning when he's hung over and crawling out of bed just in time to get her to daycare & off to work. I'm thinking of changing some things if this happens again. I'll just let H sleep & take D3 to daycare myself. Not to give H less responsibility, but so D3 isn't in the car with a man who has been out late, could still have alcohol in his system & is driving tired!

I just need to cool myself off today. I didn't say anything to him this morning as I was too heated.

Rob, thanks for always settling me down and pointing me in the right direction. You were not hurtful, rather very helpful.

Thanks!

SueS