I was still referring to the lingering emotional attachment I still have with her. Thats the part that drives me crazy, and everyone on the outside of this looks at me like "man, you are crazy how could you still feel ANYTHING for this woman?"
...because you are a strong supportive and loving H....you created a family with this woman...because you honor your word...because your are here means that you walked down the aisle, probably like many of us, 'til death do we part'. We didn't break stride with our emotional attachments. THEY DID. And this....forces us to travel down a path that we never wanted.
Mako....you....me....we can love someone deeply but that in itself doesn't mean that that the R is healthy or right for us. I don't say that you or I should simply abandon someone, but, I DO believe there is a point where it can become too destructive. My L is very much into studying the Bipolar aspects of spouse's and D. Sadly, she tells me that over 70% of M's involving a Bipolar S goes on to D. Is it right? Not sure. On the flip side, 30% don't. Those are probably the S's that have the strength and abililty to see their illness and want to stay healthy. They probably stay in IC and stay on meds.
THERE..is your real challenge....to know THAT. In the interim, you still must keep you and your girls safe. If you really DO love her, then you will have the patience of Job and get her help. I can tell you ONE THING for sure....your heart WILL tell you if or when you are 'done'. Stay strong. FIB
Me 55; XW 47; 2 kids (S13, D11) Bomb 05/19/06 Original thread http://tinyurl.com/yg2ou2t Last anniversary 04/25/10, Divorced 5/12/10 Status: Loving father of 2 beautiful children;
