As always, you take on the responsibility of your own situation and your own emotional and mental state. This shows remarkable strength.
I just have one concern here. I know that for myself over these past grueling months, the stress brought on by my situation has taken a real toll on my health and I've become clinically depressed. I went to a shrink last week because the depression and the anxiety have reached debilitating levels. He put me on an anti-depressant, which I have since quit, and have started on SamE instead. (I don’t like harsh pharmaceuticals, I prefer natural remedies. I will let you know if it helps or not.)
I just worry that perhaps you and others here, have also reached maximum overload and are now clinically depressed. This could also be a reason for all the tears and feelings of despair. (Not that you don't have good reason for all that sadness. But maybe there is more to it?)
It's just a thought and a concern for you dear friend.
Quoting Jeannine: I just worry that perhaps you and others here, have also reached maximum overload and are now clinically depressed. This could also be a reason for all the tears and feelings of despair. (Not that you don't have good reason for all that sadness. But maybe there is more to it?)
Jeannine -- Thank you as always for your concern! I am glad to hear that you went to see someone....I've been worried about you! DO let me know how the Sam-E works out...I considered that myself for a while and haven't ruled it out!
There have been times when I've felt pretty certain that I am depressed -- at other times, it feels like I'm not but still reeling from the shock/sadness/hurt of the a and its aftermath. I've been seeing a C. every two weeks for a few months...that's helping somewhat and I hope that she would let me know if she thought that I was depressed...or respond if I told her that I thought I was.
While reading over my post it occurred to me that it made perfect sense that the weekend my h. was AWAY contained sadness and crying, etc...I spend quite a bit of energy NOT showing how often I am sad, etc, to him, so without that constraint, well, let the tears flow!
I will be sure to keep an eye on my mental state...don't be shy if you see something that seems, well, concerning (and I'll do the same!)
Sage
Relax. Appreciate. Be calm. Laugh. Enjoy. Be secure. Be loving. Be loved. Don't personalize. Don't ASSume. Accept. Be grateful.
1. H sounded genuinely excited when I called him. He usually answers the phone with his "telemarketers voice" but he brightened right up when he heard it was me!
2. H. met me at the door when I got home from work with a big hug and passionate kiss!
3. H. was so awesome with the kittens yesterday -- he called with a "cat update" and also was snuggling with them last night.
4. I got a BIG hug and kiss upon waking up! I love this!
Sage
Relax. Appreciate. Be calm. Laugh. Enjoy. Be secure. Be loving. Be loved. Don't personalize. Don't ASSume. Accept. Be grateful.
truly great stuff...and what's not to love about it!
I'm loving the new positive focuss that we are taking here in piecing...of course it doesn't rule out the fact that we will still have those "bad" feelings from time to time...but I think that if we focus and let be known the good things that are happening it can help us all to stay on track.
on my thread alone since I've started letting the possitives be known (I'll admit that I didn't think to list them because here is where I try to deal with the "crap") it is helping others to see that h is trying and my "complaining" is more about me and my feelings than about him and "us".
let's keep the good times rolling and help eachother filter out those nasty "what if" thoughts!!
My sitch is way behind you, okay actually in the toilet... but I am going to try to adopt your three good things rule. So tired of feeling lousy and down. I am using Positive Thoughts - some herb/vitamin and hopefully it will work.
I love your philosophy regarding give joy to get joy, etc, and am also going to try to remember that. If I can't do it with my H, at least my friends will appreciate it! And I so need friends to WANT to be with me right now, I am such a downer around my friends, I think because it is so relaxing with them, I know they love me, and the tears just FLOW (amazing, how there really is NO end to tears, is there?). Hang in there, your R is a true inspiration.
Relax. Appreciate. Be calm. Laugh. Enjoy. Be secure. Be loving. Be loved. Don't personalize. Don't ASSume. Accept. Be grateful.
