All Hope is lost/Help - Part 2

[Evie]

Good question Jen - I hear a lot of positive stuff that he says to the kids or about the kids, especially the girls who are older, things like; how extremely proud he is of them and how much he loves them, he never really said that before.

As far as he is concerned the only changes i see that he has made is too emerse himself further into work. More private lessons to pay for the extra rent money. Organising himself on courses at work and looking at courses to further himself in the future.

He goes to the gym more, because he can and he hates his current flat and has little else to do or friends to do it with.

I have no idea if he is happy with his decision, I think he is but you can never be sure. He won't be pushed into anything, everything will be done when he is ready. I think if i iniate a conversation about where we are now, where I am, where he is, what I want, what does he want, it would get me no where or I would get a huge rejection, which right now i don't want too face.

I have been the one for the last 4 years who has tried to iniate a R conversation when I knew in my gut that something was wrong with us and he wouldn't/couldn't talk, i've been the one that has iniated ML and felt as if he was going through the motions.

My plan has been to allow him space and time. To begin again as friends and build on the R from there, but we seem to be just plodding on and getting more comfortable with the sitch as time goes on.

So I guess he is sitting in his wet nappy. What would we expect him to be doing to help himself? People advice it can take time, given the amount of time we were together and how long our M has had problems.

H is on good terms with all of his x girlfriends, but he MARRIED me, I shouldn't be treated like an x girlfriend that he can say he's bored with and walk away b/c it has got tough.

Thankyou for reading and for your insight, advice and suggestions.

x Eve