My W and I attended Retro back in January. When I received the paperwork from Retro, it mentioned the stipulation that there be no ongoing affair, but our organizer never specifically asked about it. My W ended her A about three weeks prior to the first weekend and was very hesitant to attend. She agreed primarily because I suggested it as a final attempt before I would agree that we had tried 'everything'. Something clicked on the Saturday of that weekend. The program focus on many differnet aspects of marriage, but the recurring message was that love, trust and forgiveness are decisions. The talks from the presenting couples where brutally honest and very emotional and helped us to realize that our problems were not insurmountable. These couples had gone through so much, yet displayed true love for each other. It was really inspiring.
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How can you get an understanding of what led to your spouse having the A, or what they felt was lacking in the marriage, if your spouse has never told you and Retrouvaille does not allow you to talk about the past in the dialogues?
There is no focus on the past wrongs in the relationship and there is no requirement for the couples attending to speak out about their relationships. There are excercises utilized throughout the weekend to help the couples get back in touch with their feelings for each other. It really is a re-awakening and a very positive experience.
We just finished up our final post sessing this past weekend and are definitely in a better place today because of it.
