peace, You're welcome. I got the book too (from Amazon) and it arrived last week. I haven't had a chance to read it yet but plan to. Let me know what you think of the book and of "The Prodigal's Perspective".
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I like your positive attitude that will take you far
Thanks so much for your kind words. I do really believe that a positive attitude makes a big difference. I believe the Law of Attraction works, and that thoughts become things.
Thanks for your kind wish. I did respond to my H's email, and his kind caring thought. I left it back in his court and said to let me know whtt time/day would work for him, in terms of talking face-to-face.
PH, Your H must have been shocked to see how much he owes as he probably thought you would never ask him for the money. Take MMF's advice and don't make it personal.
When you get together to discuss, simply listen to what he says without disagreeing and arguing. Once he's said his piece, you can then give your perspective. I'm sure the numbers are clear as you've written them. I'm sure the two of you will work it out. Much time has passed that you will be discussing this logically rather than emotionally like I did just 2 months after our separation.
I hope your dog is feeling better, poor thing. I'm sure you were feeling helpless until the door was unlocked but you know that the dog knew you were there for her regardless. She could feel your love and concern for her. God was watching over the both of you.
Glad you are both home sound and safe.
Hugs, ISLH
Me: 49 - S22 & S26 H: 41 - No kids M: 10/00 Bomb New Year's Day 2006 H living w OW 01/07; have baby 12/07 D final 07/07 Thread #9 - Hope Lives On
PH, I feel for you and your dog! It must have been panic and torture wrapped together in one tight bundle.
Dogs are amazing. We make honest mistakes (really not your fault since your locks are acting weird) and they forgive us. Even if we do something bad to them, they usually forgive us when we are in our right mind.
Amazing creatures. So full of love.
Me:56, W:51 D:26,S:24,S:22 Married:18 Bomb 9/27/06 Separated 11/27/06 Divorced 10/6/08 Leaving it up to God
Your H must have been shocked to see how much he owes as he probably thought you would never ask him for the money. Take MMF's advice and don't make it personal.
Yeah, I think he is in shock. I am glad I brought it up now rather than later, as the "shock" would only get worse with time.
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When you get together to discuss, simply listen to what he says without disagreeing and arguing. Once he's said his piece, you can then give your perspective.
Good point. Makes sense to let him talk first.
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Much time has passed that you will be discussing this logically rather than emotionally like I did just 2 months after our separation.
Yes, I am so glad I waited long enough. At least now, he has had the time to see the good in our R.
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I hope your dog is feeling better, poor thing. I'm sure you were feeling helpless until the door was unlocked but you know that the dog knew you were there for her regardless. She could feel your love and concern for her. God was watching over the both of you.
Glad you are both home sound and safe.
She's feeling fine, thanks! It's a relief for sure. She is a forgiving creature, and never complains. She's SO patient and accepting.
I hope you are enjoying your time off work. Hugs, PH
PH, I feel for you and your dog! It must have been panic and torture wrapped together in one tight bundle.
Thank you!! Yes, I was nervous and was praying that God would take care of the situation. At one point, I wondered if this was the "end" for my dog.
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Dogs are amazing. We make honest mistakes (really not your fault since your locks are acting weird) and they forgive us. Even if we do something bad to them, they usually forgive us when we are in our right mind.
Agree. That's why I so appreciate dogs. I have only had Rotties, and know how affectionate and loyal they are. They are stoic - never complaining. It must be truly unbearable to them, by the time you hear a complaint from them. My other puppy (a year ago) didn't even cry when in deep deep pain from his bowel perforation. Yes, they are so full of love.
Wow, I really got hit badly by the cold or flu or something! Been sick since Fri but today it took a bad turn and been blowing my nose every 2 minutes. My eye has been tearing and discharging all day - maybe infection. Teeth feel painful. Got s bit of a chill too. Maybe I have the flu plus eye infection.
It was awful walking my dog in the cold cold weather while feeling this sick.
I almost called my H to come take care of my dog for a few days!
The flu and colds and strep throat keep going around here , too. And many times, it does not fully go away or people have to get a different antibiotic as the ones they were on just are not working!
Take care of yourself or ask H to bring you some chicken soup-lol!!
The Bomb: 08/05 H moves out: 06/2006 H moves back: 01/07 & Out again: 01/07 H moves back: 03/08 & Out again: 04/08 H moves back: 05/09 & Out again: 07/09 Divorced 08-12 Kids: 22, 20, 19
Steelers, Thanks - yes, I am so tempted to send him a VM but don't know if he's mad at me about the bills news. "Act as if" thoughts have been coming to my mind off and on - to act as if he's loving, compassionate, kind and warm towards me, despite the bills. Still haven't heard back from him since Monday...
My stepson #1 also caught the flu this week. He emailed me about it on Monday saying he stayed home for it.
The sudden change in temperature sure doesn't help things...
Guess what? Today, I plucked up my courage and emailed my H about being sick and also attached the boys' latest email thread. In my email, I said if I got sicker, I may need his help to watch the dog.
He was very nice. Even though, it took him a few hours to respond, his response said how sorry he was that I was sick and hoped I'd get better soon. He also said to please let him know if he can help.
A few hours later, I responded saying that I need to stay out of the cold so I can recover ASAP since I have so much to get done before leaving on vacation. I said that if I didn't get my stuff done, I'd get in trouble with my boss and higher. That I have added stress from this worry.
I said it'd be great if he could walk the dog for a day or so, whether it would be easier for him to take the dog with him or for him to come over.
He replied right away saying "I will come over tonight and walk the dog.
So he came over. He called me twice. Call #1: to tell me when he was coming over and that he won't be coming into the house becasue he didn't want to catch my flu. I was to get the dog ready and hand her over to him. Call #2: to tell me he was 10 minutes away. Anyway, he came and said "Hi Hon" from the driveway. I was in the house. "Sorry you're sick" He didn't look at me at all even when he took the leash from me. After he got back, H: Do you want me to come over in the morning? Me: If you can, that'd be good. H: What time do you go to work? Me: I may work from home. H: If I can make it, I will call you. Then he looked at me and said "Sorry you're sick". He said "Sorry" about 2-3 times then. He treated me like a leper and it really hurt. I think he apologized because he knew he was hurting my feelings by treating me like a leper. If we were not separated, wouldn't he have to be close to me? He'd be in the same house, etc. I didn't understand why he treated me this way. Was he really so worried about catching the flu? Nobody at work even treated me like that today. Or was he worried I'd ask him about the bills?
Somehow, it hurt that he wasn't even trying to take care of me. It made me think of his motives for trying in our M - was his motive to simply win my love/affection for him, but not because he love me?
Apart from feeling hurt, I am grateful that he came over to walk the dog. It took him half hour each way to drive. I guess he didn't have to come over, if he wanted to be mean.
It's hard to know what he was thinking but I'm guessing he wasn't prepared to discuss the bills and he didn't want to give you the opportunity to bring up that conversation.
His purpose was to give you a hand with the dog knowing that you are not feeling well and that was something he didn't have to do.
He still continues to call you "Hon" which is a good sign to me.
Don't analyze too much.
Appreciate what he did for YOU and be sure to let him know how much you appreciated his help.
Nothing negative from what I see.
BTW, have you heard of Cold FX? It really does work wonders if you haven't tried it.
Otherwise, have some hot tea, and off to bed.
Take care of yourself, ISLH
Me: 49 - S22 & S26 H: 41 - No kids M: 10/00 Bomb New Year's Day 2006 H living w OW 01/07; have baby 12/07 D final 07/07 Thread #9 - Hope Lives On
